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10 things I want to see in smutty fanfiction - because realism.




1) Someone getting a leg cramp, partner thinks they’re hurting them, the mood is gone. 

2) Cuddling that goes on forever, without long and intimate discussions. 

3) Bra or Belt being impossible to unfasten with one hand in the dark. Having to get the other person to do it.

4) Having to violently sneeze because someone’s hair just went up their nose. Or making faces because said hair went in their mouth. 

5) Trying to dramatically throw oneself onto the bed, ending up cracking their head against the wall or bedpost on accident. 

6) Start cuddling with the intention of going further, but someone falls asleep on accident and the other person doesn’t have the heart to wake them. 

7) Wriggling around trying to strip socks off with their toes, because their hands are busy doing other things, but ending up making everything worse. 

8) Pausing to shove an uncomfortable lump of blankets, or a discarded shirt out from under someone. 

9) Trying to sexy talk, but sounding really awkward and both parties burst out laughing. 

10) Trying out one partner’s kink, and finding out the other person really isn’t into it. 

#11) killing the mood because you need to pee really bad and wait for the right moment to go but it never happens

I can state that 1, 3, 4, 6, 7, 8, 9, and 11 have all happened to me


12.) using too much lube or being so wet that it’s actually hard to keep it in because it just keeps sliding out which leads into

13.) laughing so hard at the fact that you’ve done fucked up with that that your partner can’t stay hard and the mood is essentially killed and you have to end up just like jerking each other off or something

14) “Wait, I have to go find a towel” because we don’t have energy for both sex and changing the bed before going to sleep.

15) Having to use the most unsexy position to deal with both party’s aches and pains of that day.

16) Making a VERY unsexy noise that causes an unsexy snortgiggle.

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  • Colin Baker: There are a lot of young girls watching the show now because of... let me say the words... David Tennant.
  • Audience: *cheering and clapping*
  • Peter Davison: You keep away from him!
  • Colin: You better calm yourselves, that's his father-in-law

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Reversing Questions


How can you feel feminine? How can you look at what society wants for women and consciously, deliberately choose that?

Oh, you didn’t choose? Well, don’t you think it’s wrong that you’re putting yourself in a lower position for the rest of your life?

How can you like blondes and brunettes? I don’t understand, how can you like two hair colours?

What does it mean that you like all hair colours? How is that possible?

Are you sure you’re monogamous? Doesn’t that put a strain on your relationship, to have to stay with the same person all the time?

What do you mean, you wanna have sex with someone? Ewww doesn’t that sound complicated? Parts going in other parts. You should just be happy without that.

Wait so, you like people with different bits? How are they supposed to know how to make you happy? How does it even work, you know, if you’ve got different stuff?

Oh my god you don’t want surgery? So you’re completely happy in the body you were born in? What is that even like? How can you live like that?

This is what you sound like. This is how inane these questions are.

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For more posts like this, follow Ultrafacts



For more posts like this, follow Ultrafacts

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apologizes for apologizing too much

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Things UNIT veterans prefer not to talk about:

  • The day the orange juice was sentient
  • The day the portaloos were Autons
  • The day it wasn’t a real Dalek, just the shadow of a box with a sink plunger and an egg whisk sticking out of the top
  • The day the aliens were less than an inch tall and Private Jeffries accidentally trod on their ambassador during the peace talks
  • The day the aliens knew about Earth only from Star Trek and Benton and Yates got into a row over which costumes to buy because Benton refused to let his men wear actual red shirts but Yates really wanted to put Spock ears on the Doctor

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Amanda Abbington on Twitter 1 May & 2 May 2014


Amanda Abbington on Twitter 1 May & 2 May 2014

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"Does it need saying..?"


"Does it need saying..?"

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Graham: David, you crazy?

Too freaking adorable for words!

I still laugh everytime I remember this interview :))

I love men who gush about their love for socks!!!!